Sunday, April 01, 2007

You is a MADMAN or what?

Now allyuh if its one thing that I believe is alarming about Trinidad is the number of mad people it have in this country. It only take a stroll down the road for you to see the abundance of clearly disturbed people that live amongst the homeless,.You might see the man trying standing in the middle of the road around the Savannah or the man screaming and pointing at people in St.James and think its funny.I always remember in my 'convent' days where there was a teacher from St.Mary's who apparently went 'mad'. Everyday he used to report for work at school fully promptly dressed in suit and tie with his briefcase in hand. Of course, the school would never let him in but he would spend all day at the corner rifling through the papers in the briefcase and intermittently cussing passersby. On a afternoon he would be cussing students. I always wonder what brought these people to that point where they just went mad. Did they go on drugs? Did they have some terrible experience that push them over the edge? Or is it just that they born mad? I have a friend who works at St.Ann's hospital aka 'the madhouse' and some of the stories he has told me about what he has to deal with on a daily basis is really something else.

What worries me more is that it have an abundance of people who seem to be living normal functioning lives and are just friggin looney tunes in their head. I go be very honest with you and say that I have been accused of being 'mad' myself at one instance because of my temper. But I can tell you, I am not mad because I don't get upset unless I have a valid reason to be upset. Valid being a belief that can be substantiated with hard evidence. What I have is an anger management problem because I can get very heated when I get angry. And it is something that I am managing very well.

But there are people in this country that seem to create their own fantasies in their head and believe things with no real foundation or evidence. Take for instance the girl who thinks I want her man and seems to be obsessed with me. If I don't EVER speak to your man, call your man, would never take calls from him anyway and I have MY OWN man whom I enjoy a delightful long term relationship with and who is definitely hotter. Why would you think that I want ANYTHING to do with him? Herein lies the beginning of all these tragic stories we read about almost daily with the spouses who trip and commit murder suicides. You will hear a story in the papers about a 'love traingle' when alot of times it is a paranoid individual who can't deal with the real issues in their relationship. Most recently it was the security guard who killed his wife on the job with his duty firearm. Their families have yet to even put forward a theory as to the motivation for the killing.They did not even know that they may have had problems. Take for instance again, my friend who has been receiving telephone hang ups and getting notes left on her vehicle from some woman who seems determined to let her know that she is with her boyfriend. Doh mind she does not kow anyone by the name of whom is signing the notes and her boyfriend is overseas.Mistaken identity? Or mad people? If god forbid the person was to attack her, it will be too late when they relaise they have the wrong person.

I really think its unfortunate that people who are living their lives in peace should be tortured by the evil forces present in other people's dysfunctional minds. In my case I have been accused of speaking about the person in front of her and saying things about her in passing. Now, seeing that I don't give a shit about these people, they are just about invisible to me. As far as I am concerned , they don't exist. The space that they occupy is empty.Being the asshole that I am , I can assure you that whenever I have reason to say anything to anyone I say so straight in your face. So I wanted to tell someone they were a psycho bitch, I would walk up to them and say 'Hey, you're a psycho bitch.' So if someone was to say I was speaking about them just because they see me speaking to someone in their line of sight I would definitely think that they are a paranoid freak. What makes people like this feel that they are even important enough for me to even speak their names?

I take particular concern with this since I have also been on the receiving end of having not one but TWO psycho ex boyfriends. My friend believes that we are all entitled to at least one in our lifetimes and I just got really lucky.I make jokes that I am not sure If I attract psycho men or if I just turn them crazy. My guy friends make jokes that I had to be the best bedroom performer in history to make them fellas act so. But in all joke and shit talk it was a very unsettling and sometimes scary experience on both occasions. In both instances I never saw any signs of instability until I broke it off. And that in itself was scary, how could I not know that they would be this crazy? What if I had married these people!! Dear god, what if I had their children!!

And by instability I mean, irrational behaviour such as not being able to accept the fact that I don't want to see them anymore and going all out to prevent me from seeing anyone else. I have had 50 voicemails on my phone (saying bitch), I have had incessant calls/text messages, I have had marriage proposals and even people following my car. You name it. Ironically my b/f has also had a stalker in his travels before me. A girl got his number from a party comittee invite and started calling him everyday and he had no idea what she looked like.Apparently this person had also done the same with his friends until continued to until she found a new victim.

I have also had the distinct displeasure of having one of the psycho exs resurface after YEARS of no contact. So being at peace with myself, I foolishly acted amicable instead of running for the hills. I soon found out that he was still mad. He eventually started speaking about our long past relationship and was seriously relating stories of things that happened that never did! When I pointed this out figuring that maybe he was just getting me mixed up with someone else, he insisted that I was indeed the person he was referring to. It was then I realised that he had created scenarios in his head to justify his past unreasonable behaviour.

Now considering that one of my exs had a supposed girlfriend/hornerwoman while he was stalking me and she was pretty much aware of what was happening, what would that make her?MORE CRAZY???? Now that I think about it, they both had woman waiting in the wings. And both women where delighted that I had locked off the realtionship becasue they felt that they would have the man all to themselves.Both women identified me as the enemy cause even though I was no longer interested, their man was and I became the unfounded cause of the strife in their relationship. Now if yuh man was tracking me how I could be the problem? All joke aside I would not wish these people on my worst enemy. Seriously, I urge all you men, and women out there to take HEED OF THE EARLY SIGNS OF MAD PEOPLE and get OUT as soon as possible. Mad people speak and get upset over things that have no basis or evidence. Doh feel that if yuh horning yuh man /woman and they suspect that they mad, no you bring that upon yourself. I am referring to complete fabrications, illusions, distorted realities. In order to asssit you, please note the following...SIGNS THAT YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER IS MAD.

  • They tell you that they still seeing other people but you can't see other people.
  • They follow you like James Bond to see where you are going OR They can't find you or reach you so they drive around the place looking for you until they do.
  • They don't waste time checking your phone, but call their link in TSTT and get a print out of your text messages and calls.
  • They tell you they want to marry you after 1 month.
  • They think everyone is speaking about them behind their backs or everyone knows something they don't know.
  • They make up stories about you to tell their friends so they don't look crazy.
  • They tell their friends that you are still in a serious relationship.
  • They run behind your car....while its moving
  • They call literally every minute (i.e call, go to voicemail, hang up , call again)
  • They leave a voicemail every time they call.
  • They call at every a.m. hour to make sure you home and have not left to go somewhere.
  • They try to be friends with your friends so they don't look crazy.
  • They show up in front your home/office unannounced and unwelcome
  • They just stand in front your home/office till its time for you to leave.
  • They make false reports to security/police just because you are not speaking to them.
  • They threaten to kill you and then call the day after like nothing happened.
  • They deny stalking you although you have witnesses and a read out of all your calls.
  • They violate the restraining order.
  • They are physically,emotionally or verbally abusive especially in public.
  • They believe that you are destined to be together, will have their children and will live happily every after.
  • Their family thinks its just a 'phase'
  • They have a shrine to you in their room.
  • You break up and make up every week.(sure sign they Will be mad when you finally get your head straight to leave their ass)
  • They threaten to kill themselves because they can't live without you. (by special request from anon!but doh feel I eh get that too!)
  • They have a horner woman/man who thinks you are a stalker because they believe that they are the real girlfriend/boyfriend and is also trying to get at you.
  • They try to control everything you do and then turn around and say 'Look what I did for you'
  • They say its your fault your relationship or lack thereof is in the state that it is.(doh mind they horn you)
  • They send emails/text messages to your new boo to let them know that they are still number 1 in your life! yay!
  • They threaten your family who have nothing to do with the situation.
  • They try to kidnap you by refusing to take you/let you go home when you want to go home.
  • When they see you in a party (after you done) they tell you go home.
  • Even though you are not speaking to them they lime in the party right next to you and speak to all your friends.
  • They do research on your new boo including memorising their license plate, their phone number, their full address and their workplace.

Again, this is a serious thing.GET OUT while you still can. No matter how in love you think you are, it is not worth it and things can be better!

To the mad people out their , you know yourselves, leave me out of allyuh bacchanal!!

Saying for today courtesy our friends and Cote Ci Cote La..

USE YUH KIDNEYS- Use your brains.From a joke about a madman released from the asylum because he 'used his kidneys' while pointing to the brain.


Anonymous said...

They tell you that they still seeing other people but you can't see other people

... and when you do they say ok they can accept that and wait outside your house for you to come back at 2 in the morning and beg to come in.

They don't waste time checking your phone, but call their link in TSTT and get a print out of your text messages and calls check their phone, in front their face, make out they horning you as usual and done with them then they decide you horning THEM because you know alot of men some of whom sent you valentines wishes on kicks.

They leave a voicemail every time they call

...or a text message, or 100, then leave about 100 on your friends phones too and they start off talking about love and end up talking about how you are such a bitch

They show up in front your home/office unannounced and unwelcome
...and cry and threaten to kill thmselves

They make false reports to security/police just because you are not speaking to them

... or because you made a report on them first and in their report they say you are calling and threatening them...yes threatening to make a police report lol that one was particularly crazy

Their family thinks its just a 'phase'

They make up stories about you to tell their friends so they don't look crazy
...stories about how you said you would kill them but they forget the rest of the sentence where you said you would kill them if they ever come near you again.

They follow you home from fetes, after digsing up your friends cars, rough you up, cuss your friends, mash up your phone, this is after they lime whole night in another fete with their next girlfriend

They rip out your front door to get into your house after you lock them out then they sit crying outside after you've locked yourself in your car.

They go to court and lie real bold faced like then just stop showing up making you realize how the court just doesn't care in Trinidad.

Oh shucks this is your post, my bad,lololol, is me but I will stay anonymous because i ain't want any MORE ppl knowing meh business.

Seriously though ladies, if there is anyone reading this who going through anything remotely similar you really really need to get out of that relationship. It is abusive and you don't want to find out the hard way by ending up in the newspapers and like the Jumbie say it does be real normal looking people. Charming when they decide to not be crazy. And no you cannot help these people, or try to get them help, I try all that. Is not about being ashamded either, people have been through worse.Run.

Carnival Jumbie said...

Boy the fact that OTHER PEOPLE in Trinidad have experienced this is PROOF that I am not mad. And I know for sure we not talking about the same ppl.
Boy I forget that whole threaten to kill themselves, I have to edit that post specifically for that.LOLOL
Regarding the court process..sad but true, the courts offer very little protection. To a certain extent I blame all those women who took their licks and went back cause it makes things bad for people like you and me who serious about getting rid of mad ppl in their lives and every time you try to file a complaint they look at you like 'yeah right, next week allyuh will be loving up'. NOOOOOO WE DIDN'T AND guess what..he STILL MAD.FYI a $3 stamp will get you a court date and a restraining order. FYI again, I have had MANY people ask me how I got mine and where they could get theirs.

Crankyputz said...

Scary, Very Very Scary...

ttfootball said...

This post is some real funny shit, unfortunately true, so many stories, so many... they always say it have more mad people outside than in [the mad house]

saucydiva said...

I have never been through this with either psychi exes or psycho ex girl friends but I KNOW these mad men/women are real! Girl just be careful and watch you back, envy is a hell of a thing.

Anonymous said...

First time responding to an article on your blog...because I heard it was a good read, and it was.

Yep...I've experienced it recently. It's scary to see that I could relate to more than 60% of those warning signs. I'm glad I SPRINTED for the hills when I did..and now reading this post has made me realize that I can't let my guard down like I have been recently.

Thanks for the read..I think I just woke up. =)

'rah said...

There needs to be a freakin support group for ppl trying to get away from mad ppl oui! I had a psycho-ex and praise de lawd I leave he ass in NY and moved back to Trini (he followed me to NY in the first place) otherwise I'd probably still be embroiled in that bacchanal.

But lemme just say that it is so true that years later you might encounter the person and act normal and civil and friendly only to realise that DEY STILL MAD! Up to now (7 years since we done) my ex will sometimes email me all cool like but when I respond in a friendly manner he eventually starts back with the made-up "memories" and for some strange reason repeatedly tries to get me involved with his family - "Could you take my sister shopping? I know you always had SUCH good taste" or "My cousins are in Trinidad visiting from New Jersey could you help them find a rental car/place to stay in Tobago/place to shop?"

Hottie Hottie said...

Bwa ha ha! Girl, I thought was just me. The AMOUNT a mad people I encounter in my life (I mustbe a lil unstable too?) Suicide threat? Check. Even showed me the scar which was kinda hard to see but he insisted was there. Following me around the country? Check. Embarrassing in public? Check. Report to police? Check. Ammm.... what else... and the being cool after years pass but they still mad. CHECK CHECK CHECK CHECK CHECK. It have more ah dem outside dan in yes.