Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Eyes Wide Shut (*yawn*)

Really and truly I find the whole pre-Carnival party scene is pretty whack this year. I am holding out hope upon hope that next year will not be the same. I did not party as much as I usually do becaue I saving my money but when I do go out I am a bit disgruntled that I even wasted the outfit.
Well we get the 'S' early that Machel would be performing early so we ditch the people who were sticking and hurry up the road. Well I never know this party was going and be so popular this year. I eh know if is cause there was not much to do last night or if Glow get too bougie for the ghetto youths with that "Pose" shit. But can I tell you it had REAL ppl park in EVERY street aurrounding the Oval. Usually I would get a park on a side street just after the oval. This year I move earlier than usual and closest park I get was by Hooters there on Rust Street. So we had a nice little walk to get to the party.

In making my rounds and seeing the kind of skettel outfits parading down the street I should have expected the scene that greeted me at the party entrance.When I reach by the Oval, the whole of Elizabeth St was block off with people in the road. A set of scalpers selling tickets for $300 and more (ticket price was $150 pay drinks).Usually I would classify this party as a 'uptown fete' but not this night nuh. Real characters was liming outside the party looking like they was gearsing up to find their way inside. I passing and all i getting is "DAH LIN", "REDS", "SWEETNESS". So much so that my friend (very uptown) who has never been ask me if I sure this is an uptown fete and if we should sell we ticket and go home. I can't tell you how close I came to that and in hindsight I would have make some much needed cash.

Apparently when we reach they were not letting in people for some reason. It have lanes marked off for men and women to enter and everybody was in one big jam by the door mix up. Well boy, as we pressing forward Machel come on the stage and I felt the whole mob push forward to rush the gate. A little bit again and people was going and get step on. Of course just inside the gate security was confused cause they wanted to search everybody. Since the lines were already mixed up thsi caused more congestion when man had to go left and woman had to go so. I waited patiently for someone to pretend to search me and realised that nobody was taking me on, so I walked in. Along with a lot of other people I might add. Then I realised, I doh even remember this party having so much security in times past. I doh know if its because of the changing times or the changing crowd.

So Machel on the stage and it RAM with people. I get close up on one side after dredging thru the mass of ppl. Machel's performance was not as good as I have seen him in recent times. He performed a lot of newer songs that seemed unfamiliar to most people. As a result the crowd was very unresponsive at times.(i.e when he was not singing Jumbie). My camera phone is crap so I did not get pics though I was close up. I was regretting it later on when one of the groupie girls in front put on a show for everybody. So the doolahin leaning over the barrier in the front of the stage and my first thought was that all she tut tuts going and fall out the super low cut top she had on. All this playing out on the big screen eh. Well yuh know Machel notorious for letting girls feel he up while he performing. Well the Doolahin was not going to disappoint. After some blatant crotch grabbing , she began to gyrate her head in his crotch area and went further to simulate fellatio (look it up).Aye we still on the big screen. Well he make a turn, sing two songs and reach back by the Doolahin. Well then she start all over with the show. Now I eh know if she was drunk off she ass or what but I would have get put out my house for how she was getting on. Now this is a woman eh look like no smallie either. I tell my friend is best I bring a video camera to tape and sell some of this porno online. She start again with the fellatio charade..then she went so far as to stick her tongue between her fingers and simulate cunnilingus (look it up).. Of course Mr.Machel was all to happy to encourage and oblige. He hit her some shot in her face with his crotch and there was her head again rolling in his crotch. I think the whole display turned off a lot the crowd especially women. Expressions of disgust were tantamount (i getting on like a dictionary today eh). He finished his set in a big way and teh crowd in the end was hyped up. His performance was ok generally but like most I was not impressed by the display.

So after watching the live soft porn we went to get a drink. Boy the bar was the WORST. On top of having a chit system with only two chit booths the bar was poorly stocked by Carib Bars. Not a LLB was had inthe place. Not a sorrel shandy, not a red bull.What is this new "Battery' crap? Imitation red bull? Wait! Not a Johnny Walker!!! Not a cranberry juice to go with the vodka. I was right up on the bar from teh get go.After waiting for nearly 20 minutes at the highly understaffed bar to be attended to I nearly turn over the bar when the man tell me $30+ $10 =$50. And the man INSISTING that it is so.STEUPS. Needless to say I spend $20 alone that night.

We take a little walk to check out the scenes which was difficult because of the congestion in certain areas. Saucy perform and like she only sing "Bicycle Wine" because before I knew it she was gone. If it was 10-20 minutes it was plenty. KMC came on after and by this time my back was to the stage. I just lime with my friends. Afew people around me independantly commented that real people were going to get rob that night just based on some of the movements of certain groups of people. Of course they were all dressed in black.The party usually finishes early regardless.Shortly thereafter we looked to make a move home before the rush of ppl. I was home in my bed before 4am.

So overall the party was ok. And I only giving it ok cause it had Machel present in the dance , otherwise it would be a worst party. I glad I put down a recycle outfit yes.

Word for today is Bacchanal...cause its Bacchanal Wednesday! As in...

Carnival is real Baccchanal!

I eh walk with the dictionary today so I doh have the official definition right this second. But we all know it is a synonym for confusion.I will edit it later cause I type this whole article in the ppl wuk. (Doh ask me to work for Carnival)

The official definition:
Bacchanal : Public row, scandal,Bobol,quarreling.Big fete.Confusion.Bacchus Roman name for Dionysus,Greek mythology deity of bacchanalia-religious wine festivals.

I guess is true then, Carnival is BACCHANAL!


saucydiva said...

Blogger giving me beams to read and post comments this afternoon.

I am quite surprised that EWS attracted such a "rough" crowd and the bar from my experience was always a mess, but not as bad as u described.

I fully agree with u and not getting the vibes to fete this week... I am like what is there to do where to go and coming up empty.
I went 3 parties thus far and all were all -inclusive.

Fete prices turning me off for real. I done have to spend money on hair and makeup, essential stuff!

Carnival Jumbie said...

Well i did not just write the post blindly. I asked opinions from several ppl (othe rthan who went with me) and they all said the same thing .
Maybe their marketing strategy was different this year. Before yuh had to "know somebody who know somebody"
I think I good with that EWS yes, not me again

saucydiva said...

I believe you,just surprised how the fete changed.My friend said they were advertising it all over 96.1 hence the reason for a diff. crowd this year. Her theory is to stay away from anything advertised on 96.1 lol

tantiejean said...

Thanks for the post I've been waiting all day for your review. Certain ppl said I bad mind cause I missed it. So what's there to look foward too for the rest of the week. Saucy feel free to answer too as ur opinion counts with the fete-goers. Oh and are you still getting that dragon tattoo miss jumbie??

Jamette said...

I stay away from anything advertised on 96.1 and 96.7 i stay further from dat. Even when certain ppl goingn to zen and the man painting the house start to talk about how he done have his tickets... i staying home one time. I doh care how it sound nah i too old and i have ppl to be around for. I not going nowhere for nobody to rush me and feel me up and potentially talk to me any old how. Sorry. i heard EWS had real grings for real so is not just you

salsaman said...

I was also there and was not impressed. It was my first time and my wife told me about the previous years where the women would wear masks etc. Not much of that this year. On the other had Bacchanal Wednesday at Bowen marine was great. There was actually space to move around and even got my left over drink chits refunded. Has anyone tasted the new rum and cola drink in a can.They were going for 2 for $15 while a rum and coke in a small cup was $12. I had five of them and could not get up this Morning Today I'll give tribe in the oval a break and rest up for the weekend push.

Island Spice said...

Gyul. I couldn't agree more! EWS was smelly bollocks this year. The line outside was madness. The police human wall inside the gate made me feel like I was in some war torn city. And I have officially sworn off all black parties! yuh right .. like half the crowd look like a potential robber.
Miss lady who was attempting to lick Machel really made me queasy. Like she eh have no friends at all. Mine woulda kuff me for sure.. surely I wouldnt get a second chance to display myself like that.
Next year this fete will pass me for sure. Thank goodness I got comps!;)
That said.. I am off to Tribe.. hope its better lit!