Monday, December 11, 2006

Fashion Police(Whatcha gonna do when they come for you!)

Sigh, Yuh know I doh know if it is that some people doh have a mirror in their house or what. As we all know with the introduction of stores like Jebelle and Hot Fudge etc, Trini has been up to the times in terms of fashions.No longer is it the privelged few who can pay to fly out and shop that have current styles as they buss' in the style magazines.

Now I have always been a fashion diva. Its probably the main reason my friends call me Diva.I maintain my subscriptions to Vogue and Cosmo .And although I have not always been able to afford the best designers and I still only own a few designer items, I try to maintain a tasteful and fashionable wardrobe on a budget. Cause if its one thing about always have someone doing a knock off. My friends would lik eto think I am there personal consultant and some refuse to buy anything until they pass it by me. Now I don't think this makes me an authority cause I eh get my degree in Fashion but I eh letting nobody go down the road looking chupid. There is however certain fashion do and don'ts that are universal and just plain COMMON SENSE. One thing that upsets me about a lot of ppl is that they tend to buy clothes that does not suit their body. Whether yuh is a mampee or a stick figure, doh wear things that not in your size/not make for your body type.

I was most distressed while watching Triniscene (big up the Crew,Kasey etc) today which I rarely visit and took a look at the 'Tempo Turns one'. Galleries. I just grimaced at first but as I moved along I felt COMPELLED to address some of the crimes I saw....Now I myself have had my bad days (in my youth) but I try my best so that if I can't be with teh new style, I at least look NORMAL. Nothing wrong with a nice top, a pair of jeans and some heels. Now I warning allyuh, I not trying to embarrass nobody or make fun of ppl I doh like. I doing a public service and since all these ppl felt they were looking great to begin with as well pose off and their pics are publically available on trinicscene..I eh hiding no faces. All inclusive coming up and just doh let this be you ..PLEASE.

Crime# 1 & 2

My girl in the pic on the left in the is BEYOND me why she would put on a halter top with a regular bra.There are so many devices created to address this. Umm....a STRAPLESS bra?? pasties, adhesive bras, silicone bras,duct tape...ANYTHING but this. I have been in a bind before where i needed some more push up than what my strapless had and used a regular bra. But all I had to do was tuck in the straps and Voila! instant strapless. She spoil the top and the outfit which would have looked just fine if she had done the right thing.

Again on the right, Bra issues. I find the top real nice but yet she ruined it with a black bra peeking through the front.Note, If yuh bra have bows in the cleavage, its not meant to wear outside. I dunno if the top was just too small or she wanted to be too sexy and eh tie it properly.Any how you take it she should have used pasties or silicone inserts that have no cross piece in the middle. Would have been much more flattering.

Crime # 3: The good, the bad and the ugly.

I doh think its too hard to say which is which( and is only outfit I referring too eh).I shall still elaborate.Exactly what my girl on the far left was going for?To me, once you have a print you need to work everything else in the outfit around that. So lets assume she was going for the scottish themed kit. She might have even get away with them leggings. But whats up with the sequined bustier?? Just cause it red and it have red in the bottom doh mean it match!!Its looks like she has on one outfit on her upper body and another below. All she had to do was put on a plain white top and she just might have pull it off. Nothing wrong with taking risks but geeese...I seriously did a double take cause I thought she was wearing the Jamettte section bra from Tribe and then realised that did not make sense as it is pre carnival..but if I was going and storm jamette section I would have take a borrow.I should send this pic to Tribe and show them what they SHOULD have got for the bustier with the issues they having now.(I refer you to Saucy's blog for that story).I want to believe she not wearing pink eye shadow too.

So her friend in the middle matching nicely, even accessorised but unfortunately hoochie is on its way out. Unless of course you dance on table tops regularly. Maybe I getting old...but I have always had a fashion rule...short top,long bottom...long top,short bottom. Very rarely is any other combination acceptable. She young, I will let her slide. Lets give a round of applause to the friend on the far right who is the saving grace of this squad. Simple, tastefull and accessorised. Flowy top well balanced with the capris. She needs to give her friends some consultation.

Crime # 4

So on the right we have bes' Winer Sherone Providence dancing as backup for Allison Hinds. I will rate her, she cold real throw waist but they need to hang their costume designer up high. I hope for her sake, she was not the designer.... Ok so she have a bikini scene. scene..she is a dancer. What is that bottom piece exactly?? It look like a irridescent velvet diaper. No shape, no structure. Just four big ,ugly flaps. It not even sexy. Girl, is best you had keep on your pom pom shorts.

Crime #5

Like he and Sherone have the same designer. NAH! If my man was to leave the house with that top he could not speak to me. We would have to re evaluate our relationship. Its stretch brown velvet on a man. Sigh. His one saving grace is the model next to him. If I was her I would be embarrassed. Notice!!! She is not wearing an ugly black bra through the sexy dress!!Thank you Jesus!

Crime #5

Well bad bad bras seem to be the overwhelming problem in Trini.My girl in the middle..Ok so if you going out on a limb with the sexy cut out top why kill it with a black bra? Wonderful world have all kinda colour bra..If you doh have a pink bra , doh buy a pink see through/cut out top. I really hope her other two friends are twins cause they wearing the same outfit. If you are not twins, and you not doing a promotion for a company (alcohol, cigarettes etc) then its not cute to go the party in the same outfit unless is Panorama or the top has information explaining the whole point of wearing the same thing( i.e crew name/occasion.)

On Probation:

I glad she wearing prison stripes cause Patrice is OFFICIALLY on probation with the fashion police. Like she get a new stylist who making custom outfits for her.I first caught a glimpse of this in her performance last week in Zen and I raised some eyebrows. Right now she is bringing back bad memories of Faye Ann last season. I witnessed close up Faye Ann's barely there band aid of sequins she used for her soca monarch performance in which breasts was fallin out. Patrice seems to be going down that road or even down the road of Destra who was voted my worst dressed soca artiste of 2006. Ok its a costume, but its makes no sense to try to be over sexy when the garment is obviously poorly made. Why is the front bunching up like that? Is it red or orange?Cause I doh want to feel she put on red boots and the belt and the rest of the outfit orange.

And finally to offset all this bad lets give the following a round of applause.....

Anuskha , one of the Tempo VJs in a lovely number. My vote as best dressed for the night. She had the hairdo , the body everything to pull this off.Did she wear a nasty black bra ??noooooo!Check out the front view as well. She win with this kit.

So don't be a fashion crime..I will be watching you!!


no longer anon said...

Great post!!

I wish more people would be aware of their body type and what is suitable for them.

And it should be mandatory that people watch themselves in a mirror before leaving the house...cause if you come out i shit, you should be charged!!!

Anonymous said...

Saucy here,
for some reason I cannot log in under my blogger ID.

Enjoyed your commentry!

Carnival Jumbie (Diva) said...

Hey saucy, think its cause I am on the blogger beta server. I have to go through a whole scene to post on your site as well. They say if I have a beta account I can't post on a regular account/site. I figured out the loophole. I guess it won't work in reverse

Jamette said...

When i first moved back home I was in shock at first. Is like everybody want to wear low rise, super tight pants. Nobody could sit down, bend over nuthing because plenty ppl have bamsees and bamsee + super low rise doh always go together people. See me trying to force it into some low rise and say nah...not for me. Is like everybody want to be hip no matter what. No matter if yuh can't dance, can't walk...

Anonymous said...

Saucy again,
Diva I would switch to beta but they say my blog is too large at this time..steups!

Anyways, I forgot to add the model posing with guy in brown velvet (that just sounds so wrong) is quite attractive and I have seen her at parties/events looking very nice but that dress does not flatter her either! The boobs look like they need a little support and the high waist band makes it look like they are at her waist! Not flattering at all.

I saw the front photo of the dress and low cut V necks like that should be best left for women with smaller breasts... if you see the pic with the line up of all 4 girls the other girls look great because there is nothing spilling out to the front.

Anonymous said...

Karabana here
Yeah, the wrong bra can ruin an outfit for sure. Oprah did a show fitting women w the right size, it was amazing how these women who thought they were a B were really a D, or D's were actually E's. I know most women are wearing the wrong size, but to go up 2 cups??! Hmmmmm..?....?